New House!

One thing I've discovered about myself while living in Honduras is I don't like anyone to think I'm "too good" to live they like everyone else here does. One thing I've known about myself for quite some time is I also don't like to feel I've let anyone down... ever. Sometimes I think I let these things get in the way of taking care of me, and in order to take care of me, I need a few comforts from home.

THEREFORE I am proud, elated, yet humbled to announce I am moving into a new home walking distance from JEC.

This little "typico" house belongs to a retired couple in Zamorano who rent this house, around 200 yards off their main home, to locals who need something fully furnished. Not only is the house comfortable, but its SAFE.

The house has its own gate on my end (directly to the right of this picture), but the owners have their own gate as well. These are high gates which usually ward off any unwanted guests. Then if the gates don't cut it, they have 5 german shepherds to do the trick. I received this email earlier today from my landlord:

"Please remember we live in the country, therefore snakes and wild animals are pretty average. Luckily the dogs usually take care of this before we have to see them."

I'm not sure I can say it enough - Thank you, Lord, for german shepherds!!!

kitchen area

The house has a small kitchen, also fully furnished (amazing!!), a living area with a kitchen table (YOU MEAN I CAN ACTUALLY SIT AT A TABLE AND ENJOY A MEAL?), one main bedroom with a closet, a small guest bed with a closet, and a bathroom. I still have my outside washing board and basin - for all those of you who were worrying!

living and dining room area

On a more serious note (I know you can all tell just how excited I am), I am very humbled this was able to work out the way it did. For a while now, I've felt very bogged down by the culture, the people, and often have questioned why I have put up with it all. But the one unwavering call I cannot deny is these boys. They have been faithful in their need for me. They don't let me down. And sometimes even though they're frustrated with me (as an authority figure), I know they love me and appreciate me. And sometimes I cannot even say that much about the adults here.

I have a hot water heater (see shower head) even if it does come out in a trickle!

When people ask me what I miss the most about home, obviously family and friends come first to mind. Shortly after I think about the little luxuries like in my last post, but most often I miss my culture. I miss the ability to talk to someone and fully believe every word they are saying. To know they aren't lying just to lie. To not have to question friendships and motives. No one is perfect, but this is something I am telling you all - we do not appreciate it like we should.

master bedroom

I am more grateful now than ever to have been brought up in a home where no one lied to me. Where my parents taught me honor, trust, and all good things. Sometimes I think this culture is so wrong for so many reasons because they simply know no better. This was the way they were raised. And THAT means these boys at JEC have a strong advantage. They're growing up slightly different than most young men in this country. They're being raised by loving, christian families who teach them about Jesus and His qualities. This is something we should ALL be extremely grateful for if we care about these boys.

where I will wash clothes/water source

So, starting on May 7th, I can walk to work. I can go to bed and not have to worry about something happening to me in my sleep (sorry mom). I can rest assured God is truly watching over me and has been the entire time. I can walk over to the green house and watch a movie on Saturday nights. I can stay late and do homework with the bilingual boys and not have to worry about getting home late in the dark. These are simple things, but they have uplifted my spirit and washed my worries away.

I needed a private place to relax and renew my spirit, but moving out of JEC came at a cost of feeling lonely and unsafe at times. God has answered a prayer and a worry I didn't realize I had until it was taken away.

Now if that's not a God who's looking out for me, what is?

**Lastly, I am fundraising to live in my new home. The price of rent here is over 3 times my last rent. If you can help, I cannot tell you how much it would mean to me. Checks can be made to Harpeth Hills Church of Christ with "Annie Brown - Honduras" on the tag line. Please check out the DONATE page of my blog for more details. 

Holy Week & Good Friday Thoughts

It's been a busy week (again). I've been working with a group from Brentwood, TN all week, and they just headed back this afternoon. We spent Saturday (see my previous post) and Sunday at JEC working on our future store to house all our new merch and playing with our boys. Monday and Tuesday were building days in Tegus, and then Wednesday was visiting the public hospital, girls orphanage, and the dump. Yesterday we spent all day WAY UP in the mountains learning about how coffee is grown, picked, and the process of making it what we use to drink. I had never seen coffee beans right off the plant before, and it was an awesome experience to translate for the plantation owner and learn first hand all about the process.

Today I headed back to Jovenes to organize, take inventory of donated items, and play catch up from the past week. While sorting through all our amazing gifts for both the boys and employees, I started thinking about how, here in Honduras, the country really shuts down for Holy Week.

I'm not used to that in the states, I guess, but its pretty weird here when all stores, banks and schools shut down from Wednesday until the next week. I think this was what pushed me to start thinking about why exactly everyone does this - and my thoughts honestly turned to tears.

I think it has taken me 24 years to honestly understand (as best as humans can) what this week is meant to be celebrated for. As I was praying over my breakfast this morning, it really hit me that so many years ago on this day (or so we think) a man chose to die for me, my family, my friends, and these boys at Jovenes en Camino. Even though we didn't exist at that point, God knew about us, and He knew my heart before it even existed. He chose to suffer just so I would have a chance to truly know Him...

*mouth opens* 

*dumbfounded look on face*

Can you just take one second to try and grasp the beauty of a love like that? The humility, patience, and above all, forgiveness it takes to act on that kind of love and HOPE for humanity... is indescribable.

My personal journey here in Honduras has not been an easy one. I have definitely struggled with not giving up on man-kind at some points. Disappointment and deception are something we have learned to be pretty good at as humans. Yet after all the times we have disappointed and deceived Jesus, He continues to love us, believe in us, and encourage us to seek an intimate relationship with Him.

I don't think there is anything more beautiful than that. 

So, at 9:49 PM on this Good Friday, I am reminded and blessed to live another day where I try to honor God in everything I do. Thank you, Jesus for giving me this opportunity to serve your people in Honduras. Thank you for teaching me about your unfailing love. Thank you for never giving up on me. Thank you for thinking of me when you were nailed up on that cross. I pray I never forget the sacrifice you made... just so you could know me intimately. I'm so humbled by the selflessness of Your love.